


dear god, i'm sorry

by artsyspikedhair



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: Child Abuse, Christianity, Credence Barebone Crying During Sex, Credence Barebone Lives, Dark Original Percival Graves, Haphephobia, Internalized Homophobia, Lowercase, Other, Physical Abuse, Rape/Non-con Elements, Starvation, Victim Blaming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-20
Updated: 2017-06-20
Packaged: 2018-11-16 17:26:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11257512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artsyspikedhair/pseuds/artsyspikedhair
Summary: credence, kneeling at confessional, screams his apologies, how he didn't mean to sin, how he couldn't stop him, but the priest merely repeats bible verses at him and credence know his mother will hear about this.





	dear god, i'm sorry

credence barebone does not like being touched. as a child, his siblings would try to hug him, but credence did not find comfort in their embraces. for all he knew, they'd be gone soon. mary lou barebone had a habit of throwing away children who didn't earn their keep. but she was his mother, and she never touched him. 

credence spent so many hours making sandwiches he could do it asleep. or, he supposed, in obscurious form. feeding other children helped him put a handle on how hungry he was. and he was hungry, all the time. the church children got fed in the morning, and only in the morning, when they needed to be prepared to hand out leaflets or go to newspapers. credence, when he was ten, didn't see the point in going to newspapers about witchcraft. then the witches would know where he was! 

credence, when he was eleven, stopped thinking too much about what he was asked to do. it was eleven mary lou first hurt him, bringing his hands with the letter in them onto the stove. somehow, he was allowed to stay. the next day chastity complained credence's pants were falling down, and the barebones went shopping for a belt. 

(credence never really forgave her for that. she couldn't have known he would end up a freak, but he believed maybe if he had never bought a belt...) 

credence barebone had never gone to school. at fifteen, somebody took notice of that. unfortunately, that somebody was one mr. graves. 

he won credence over with food and the idea of teaching the boy how to write. credence knew how to read, read the bible nightly, but mary lou neglected writing, instead leaving him to staple the leaflets. the day credence learned how to write his own name was the happiest day of his life. 

(the next day, his mother asked where he had been. he showed her the napkin he had written his name on, and she ripped his belt off of him before he could do it himself. writing was for those who wrote down the words of god, and nothing else! credence didn't stop bleeding for a whole two days. modesty bandaged him to the best of her ability, but it wasn't much.) 

credence was sixteen when things started going wrong. really, really wrong. graves had invited credence over to his house, and mary lou had given him some free time for once, because he had gotten a family of four to join the church, and graves, grave had magic. he magicked some rope around credence's hands, and then flipped the boy over. credence didn't know what was happening until he felt the older man press a kiss against his neck, and the man's wand against credence, charming his clothing off. this wasn't how anything was supposed to go, credence thought. credence was crying, snotting all over grave's pillow and graves was hurting him hurting him hurting him 

and then it was over. 

and then there was credence, kneeling at confessional, screams his apologies, how he didn't mean to sin, how he couldn't stop him, but the priest merely repeated bible verses at him and credence knew his mother will hear about this. he had committed sodomy. 

credence spent all his time at the church, praying. he was whipped daily by his mother for it, but he could feel his soul being tainted by a sin he had never even wanted, never dreamed of wanting! 

at one point,after mary lou had been hurting credence, a woman came in. she claimed to know mr. graves, thinking it would calm credence down. instead, he started sobbing. the whole story came out, about how he had been tricked and how he was a filthy sinner going to hell for something he had no control over, and it was mr. graves' fault, all mr. graves' fault. tina apologized, but she confessed mr. graves had done the same to her. she was younger, and she was working for him. credence explained that it wasn't the same. tina was a woman. women were supposed to lie with men. credence, credence wasn't. 

a team of what appear to be police came in. tina begged them not to, but graves was leading them. credence's entire memory of magic was gone. he was back in his idol worship of graves, only graves wasn't, well, graves this time. 

for months his life was find the child find the child find out why he kept on losing time why was he such a freak find the child graves is the only one who cares about me find the child find them- 

and then graves hit him, called him a squib, and the obliviate wore off. credence's magic was too strong for such a weak memory charm, and he remembered everything. 

"you can control it!" 

"i don't think i want to, mr. graves." 

he lost time again, apparently leaving the city in ruins. he was in a subway station, and a red haired man was asking if he could come near, he wouldn't harm him, can he just come closer? and credence sensed this man was different from graves, who was apparently not graves, and when he lost time again the void took him directly into newt's suitcase. 

what was left of the obscurial died. but credence- credence was finally allowed to live. 


End file.
